Talk to Yourself

[Jem]

Latest post of the previous page:

Why am I wasting time on this when I should be out sightseeing? Because I have a minging hangover.

[Alan H]

Serves him right - he never did know when to stop.

[jaywhat]

I am not speaking to these bloody people or reading their stupid comments. I bet someone will read this and comment on it when it is just me talking to myself and not for public consumption.
Now I always thought that consumption was some sort of illness and I intend to look it up right now. Yes. I am talking about public pulmonary tuberculosis. I wonder if you can have that privately.

When I was young(er) there used to be notices in public places (like toilets and even buses) which said, 'To prevent consumption, do not spit'. They should have those up in football ground dressing rooms.

Of course, if you are a good Muslim, you have to spit during Ramadan because it is forbidden to eat or drink during the sunlight hours. You are not even supposed to smell a woman's perfume either, but I have never seen a Muslim with his (or her) nose blocked up.

[Alan H]

Strange, I don't remember the 'To prevent consumption, do not spit' notice (maybe jaywhat is much, much older than me), but I do remember the 'No Spitting' notices on school buses. Why don't they have them these days? Have people forgotten how to spit?

[jaywhat]

Do I remember where I saw the spitting signs or ..... I am not making it up so it must have been in Stevenage..... but you feel proud (a bit) of where you come from and get quite a buzz when you see the name mentioned........ like 'Lewis Hamilton comes from Stevenage' ......... I had not interest in motor racing before...... I don't actually have any now I suppose ..... and as for the spitting signs, I suppose I would not want people thinking badly of the place. There must have been such signs all over and I shall look for the new thread that someone is sure to start called 'Spitting Signs' ........ it reminds me of the photo I have taken in my mispent youth of me 'pretending' to urinate against a wall in France beneath a sign that read 'Defense d'Uriner'. I actually think I was pretending so putting it in inverted commas is making me out to be more macho that I actually am - or was - so what's new?

[Ninny]

He's always going on about Stevenage, you'd think there'd be something more to crow about than Lewis Hamilton, I mean, why don't they put up "don't spit at Lewis Hamilton" signs and be done, he's just a jumped up rich kid. Spose I'd better get on with things, have a shower, what a waste of time that is, you just get dirty again.

[jaywhat]

I wonder how many people, about to have a shower, send the message around the world via the internet and certainly via Scotland so that their spouse will not inadvertently turn the kichen tap on and cause discomfort with the change in water pressure. Yes, she is in the next room and we do not like shouting, but a brief casual use of the legs would obviate that and .... why don't I shut up....... sometimes wish I hadn't started this thread.

[kbell]

What can I do to stop myself feeling so fed up? Go shopping? Nah. Watch TV? meh. Surf the web? Done enough of that already. Eat something? YAY!

[Felicia]

I wish I was eating something. But I'm in my office, up in the attic and its miles to the kitchen and I've got a load of paperwork to get through and its SATURDAY. and the sun's shining for once and I'm up here raging at the bloody pile of invoices and reports and letters and stuff to get through. So here I am, playing with the internet and hoping it'll cheer me up.... anyone?

[lewist]

Paperwork is a bummer. Still, got it done yesterday so today I can weed the flowerbed before I set off. Lucky me. It will still be there on Thursday of course, so I could leave it.

I'd better pack carefully... old clothes for the painting, good clothes in case I go out... good I slept better last night; the ribs seem to be a bit better... or maybe it's the double strength painkillers. Hope the A9 is open and quiet today but that's a vain hope for a July Sunday. Oh well.

Maybe I'll get sailing next weekend.

[jaywhat]

Need to mow the front lawn but it is Sunday and I always say if I'm retired I should not be spoiling the peace even if everyone else does and I don't want to do it anyway and I am now going on my exercise bike but I don't want to do that either but if I carry on like this I might as well go back to bed and I don't want to do that either,
'Don't want to' is my least favourite word today (anyday?) and I am using it all the time. I don't want to keep saying it to myself. I don't want to say 'I don't want to' again. Ever. I don't want to even think about it.

[DougS]

As I have loads to do today, I think I'll waste time bumping up as many threads in Club Soda as possible.

[jaywhat]

Now it's Tuesday and I still have not done the lawn and suppose I will today. Thinking of not using the 'gird my loins' expression until I am sure what it means. Thinking of not using it ever again because it sounds a bit dirty and it is pompous and clever and gives the false impression that I am classically literate.
Now thinking of girding my loins! Clearly I can stop myself using it 'publicly', but how do I stop myself saying it to myself?
I am still saying it as I type this and I think I am going mad. Now I have stopped the Simvastatin perhaps my lions will be properly caged.

[Ninny]

Looks as if Jaywhat has mowed the lawn. Wonder what his lions are up to today? Think I'll go down town and buy some jumbo oats.

[Alan C.]

Well! you seem to be talking to yourself tonight Alan, I don't know where everyone is tonight but they sure aren't here, still, it's friday night and some folk like to go to the pub and talk to real people, and who can blame them? you're not envious of people that have a life are you?, no of course not, but it does get lonely out in the middle of nowhere with nobody to talk to, ah but Mary is in the sitting room! Hiya Mary, shurrup! I'm watching Big Brother, Oh well................back to stumbledon sad man.

[lewist]

Really must go back to bed and sleep. Good impromptu party last night with all the neighbours scoffing wine in the front garden. Not even hung over, though thirsty; good stuff. I wonder if I will get to go gliding today? Would I pass a beathalyser? Can you be drunk in charge of a glider? Most likely yes. Must remember the camera if I do go.

Good to get a rest from the painting. But Monday it's reinstating radiators. Goody, my favourite. Up to a point. They'll probably all leak.

Eheu!

[jaywhat]

Well that is Eric buried and I didn't wear a tie and felt good about that. I thought social and other such gatherings would be the biggest test of my having given up alcohol but not so. The biggest test is being nice'ish to bores and farts.
The day has started well with my comments written and posted for a fastasy story which is not my cup of tea. Funny, when I read it yesterday it did my head in. I had to shake it to pull myself together and get on with the mondaine world.
Today is Nin's birthday and T and D are coming for lunch - be a good change and a hopefull dry hot sit in the garden. She is going to like the 6 poetry books I have bought all by tutors on the course she is starting at MMU. Cup of tea due now and feed Darwin.

[lewist]

Not a bad day, today. Got some of the things done that I've been feeling guilty about which is good because I'm having visitors. Plants in tubs done, hanging basket hung, car clean, grass cut, menus planned; I just have to weed the side border, write a shopping list and go shopping. Might go to Marks and the big Tesco up in Tescotown, capital of the Tescolands.

[Alan H]

Bloody hell! That guy lewist has been busy [---][/---] he posted in just about all the Club Soda threads this evening. Hasn't he got anything better to do?

Better get off to bed now: got an 8:30 meeting with the guys in India and my boss.

[lewist]

Oh Boy! A meeting! My favourite!

One of the great things about my life these days is not really having meetings. Maybe Alan likes them. It sounded like one of these teleconference thingies they do these days where they are all in different continents or something and talk over the interweb.

Mind you, meetings were often quite a good substitute for work...

[kbell]

I wonder what that smell is. Smells like a rotting carcus. It's coming from the kitchen. Should I investigate now or tomorrow.

Tomorrow.